Friends, it has been approximately two years since I have even THOUGHT about writing on this blog. I will not get into all the details, but we are all now older and wiser and...cheerios still stick to my floors.
Wanted to take a moment to share what's going on in life, at least spiritually. Our heart is like any muscle, we can't expect it to grow with out exercise. And for me exercise is not always enjoyable, I crossfit because it's necessary for my health, and I love to see my body and mind do what I once thought was impossible.
Spiritual growth is not always fun either, but necessary for a full life, for joy. We also can see impossible things done through spiritual growth, as with physical capabilities.
Last week I started reading a few books, catalytic, life changing, books. One of them is Ann Voskamp's "1000 Gifts." With the power of the Holy Spirit, and through her words its like my soul has been ripped wide open only to be stitched back together with hope, thanksgiving, and grace. Here is a note I wrote to a friend before diving into "1000 Gifts."
At 34, with 3 kids ages 3.5, 7, 10 I have found myself in the trenches of parenting, you know the daily picking on each other, the fights over the last spoon of rice, and the endless laundry and dishes; l love my job as a mom. But child rearing is not for the faint of heart!!! Some days I wake up, put on the ref jersey and blow my whistle all day until my handsome relief gets home.
Yet I've found myself mourning the loss of these times (it's crazy I know!) The passing minutes that could have been better...more grace filled, patient, regret over tempers lost. Already seeing the end...hoping and praying they all turn out as God-fearing, loving, and kind adults.
Knowing each second they are one step closer away...how can you be one step in the present and already mourning the future?
The sweet Lord, answered my cry for help the very next day through the pages of Ann's book. Here was my reply, 24 hours later.
The key to finding joy in your present and living FULLY, is thankfulness in all things. Jesus gave thanks in even the hardest and trying circumstances. Today I found myself being thankful for my abundance of laundry, we are blessed. Thankful for my arguing kids, that means they are healthy, full of spirit! Thankful for the words of Jesus giving thanks to His father even though it was hard.
We have been living in a sin of ungratefulness. Yes, a sin. Any discontent, want for more, coveting of others gifts, this is a sin. Thinking we "deserve" more is a sin. God's gifts are always enough. We don't have to have something HUGE, and magnificent to see the gifts God has given us. As Ann says, the key to peacefulness is thankfulness. Wow. What a huge thing to lay down before God, to apologize to him for a lifetime of thinking you need more that you deserve more. That you won't be happy unless you have...I need just more time in my day to do it all. I am learning, practicing, we have it all, already. Can you see the gifts in your life? Are you able to see the little gifts of love the Lord gives us each day? Jesus gave thanks over and over again. He gave thanks on the cross as he was dying. He broke bread and gave thanks as an offering.
So, friends, I am putting pen to paper, I am working-out my soul, and I am writing my 1000 gifts, the everyday blessings we overlook because we think we need to see something grand as a gift.
1. Experiencing things through my kids for the first time
2. Coffee
8. Sharing cake with my husband late at night
19. Forgiveness shown and given
20. Little boys' "I love you"
22. Joy over losing a tooth
If you find yourself feeling time and patience stretched, slow down, and give thanks for anything and do it often.
Thank you, Lord for exposing my sin of ungratefulness and growing me into thankfulness.
